SOMETIMES THERE ARE JUST REALLY GOOD LARRY MANIPS AND I JUST-
[creds to all photo owners]
ohh yess really good
And Sherlock is puzzling over John’s behaviour until he realises that John only said that after one of the other soldiers was flirting with him, and another had pulled out his chair, and another had bought his drink, but he doesn’t have time to react, because John is angry-faced, pulling him into the toilets, then John fucks Sherlock hard in one of the stalls, and Sherlock tries to whimper quietly, but then John leans over and whispers in his ear that there’s a dozen soldiers out there, and they all know that Captain John Watson is fucking him, owning him, and Sherlock is so embarrassed and turned on that all those soldiers know that he is getting fucked, and he moans aloud and John fucks him even harder, and Sherlock cries out and comes, and it’s like the greatest high he’s ever had, but when he comes down he’s ashamed and doesn’t want to face John’s mates, because he knows they heard every little embarrassing moan he just made, but john is suddenly serious and firmly ignores Sherlock’s discomfort, firmly placing his hand on the back of Sherlock’s neck and steering him into the restaurant, and Sherlock could die from the shame, but they sit at the table and only one of the former soldiers is smirking, and his neighbour elbows him and he drops his smile, and the rest just start acting respectfully toward him and asking him questions about his job, and Sherlock suddenly just starts glowing with the notion that John staked his claim on him.
i just imagine sherlock being so proud of john’s pee pee that he phonecalls lestrade like ‘gavin. my husband his dick is so big. you wouldn’t believe it. i know your name is greg. yes goodbye gaga.” and then he would just smirk by himself thinking about john’s lenght.
And I bet the other guy is very proper. He’s probably still just sitting there in the living room. Just thinking:
He probably wants to talk to Sherlock about laundry.
“OH YEAH, JOHN.”
Seems like a very enthusiastic discussion about laundry.
Probably showing him how to take out stains.
“FUCK MY TIGHT ARSEHOLE HARD DURING THIS SEX WE ARE HAVING, JOHN.”
I’ll show myself out then.
Expectation vs reality: tickle attacks
One time my boyfriend started tickling me and in a jerk reaction I Vulcan nerve-pinched him and he just fucking fell over.
I’ve never done that to anyone in my life, even on purpose.
introducing myself in the first day of school
i’ll take my chance with aliens before i mess w/ whatever is at the bottom of the ocean
I AM FUCKING DEAD. SO I WAS HAVING TROUBLE DOWNLOADING THE SIMS 2 THING THAT’S BEEN GOING AROUND SO I CONTACTED THEIR LIVE CHAT SUPPORT FOR HELP. WELL THE PERSON WANTED MY INFO AND FOR ME TO ANSWER THE SECURITY QUESTION I SET UP SO THEY COULD PUT THE GAME IN MY COLLECTION.
THE QUESTION WAS “What was your dream job as a kid?”
GUESS WHO HAD TO ANSWER THAT QUESTION TO A LIVE PERSON WITH “Doing your mom.”. SPOILET ALERT IT WAS FUCKING ME.
This is apparently a lubricant ad. Just let the reality of the image sink in for a moment.
WHY WOULD ANYONE THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA
IT TOOK ME A MINUTE AND NOW OH MY GOD
i’m like wtf are they say-HOLY SHIT
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I don’t get it. Are they saying she created the ocean? That lubrication is peaceful? What is this ad trying to say? Look, I swear, I don’t understand this and it is making me feel like—
OH SWEET JESUS PLEASE NO WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK.
Wait, what’s everyone freaking out about? I don’t get it—
OH MY GOD.
I was gonna reblog it like “I don’t get it someone help” and then
What’s with the rubbing?
just dean marveling at the beauty of their love child
My forever reblog